But in all seriousness, how does one really start a blog? Do you tell all and sundry about yourself, what you ate for breakfast? What clothes I've just hung on the line? How much money is in my bank account? My inner-most secrets? Or do you keep things nice and fluffy and anonymous?
Well, I no longer qualify for anonymity. I've just posted photos of my fat and skinny arsed self all over the net :o) So, I guess with that in mind and not wishing to divulge the above (especially my bank details) I'll start simplistically.
I am currently a stay at home Mum (SAHM) of two young boys. Aged 3 years and 6 months old. I think I'll afford them some anonymity so will give them code names for the purpose of this exercise (hey, typing burns calories don't you know?!). Anyway, I'll call my oldest son "Jim" and my youngest "Bob". Tee hee, Jim-Bob! Anyone know a certain family in America with 18 kids? Anyway, Jim & Bob are the off spring of moi (said in my best Kath & Kim voice) and my spunky husband who shall from now on be known as "Muscle-Man".
Muscle-Man and I live in Australia - yep, the lucky country! We have been married these past 5 years and for 3 of them my darling Muscle-Man accepted (well.....) 'put up with' my being a fat arsed, lazy, whinging wife. He is aptly named Muscle Man as this guy spends more time at the gym than a fly on dog poo. He routinely drinks protein shakes and a vast array of muscle building, fat stripping, bicep bulging pills and potions. Believe it or not, he could even bench press me at my heaviest (surely that is worthy of a Guinness world record).
The quest to beat the bulge began 2 years ago when as trying on a dress for my younger sisters wedding I proclaimed that I was going to loose some weight before the big day, only to be scoffed at by the sales assistant with the statement "If I had a dollar for every time I heard that in this shop.....". Needless to say I was pissed off! I couldn't believe her rudeness, but mostly I couldn't handle the fact she was right. If I had a dollar for every time I have said that, I'd be just as rich, if not more so, than she would!
For anyone who has ever battled with a weight issue, you will know that it's not as simple as putting on a pair of joggers and stepping away from the fridge. For as long as I could recall I'd tried and failed to lose weight. I'd tried Jenny Craig, Weight Watchers, bulimia, Lite N Easy, some illegal weight loss drugs smuggled into Oz from America - everything. Nothing had worked for me. I had the classic attitude of wanting a drastic change overnight. The idea that it might actually take time was equally as horrifying as the fact I'd allowed myself to become a whale in the first place. Add to the equation the fact I am an identical twin who looked NOTHING like her twin sister with my 10 chins, and her svelte, sexy self. Comparisons to "sexy-twin" (her new code name) became nothing short of daily. It was entirely common to be told that I was the "bigger" twin or that surely we couldn't be identical because I was *cough*, *splutter*, *gasp* BIGGER. I would gently remind people that the mars bar stuffed in my pocket and the one I'd just consumed were not genetic traits acquired in the womb!
Needless to say the battle was one that would require an army of emotional strength alongside physical and real lifestyle changes. On the 8th June 2006 I decided the time had come. Operation loose two butts began.
Reflecting on my weight loss journal on the 8th June I wrote this:
Goal weight: 75kgs
- I want to be a sexy Mum (maybe even a MILF),
- Look great pregnant (I looked like a hot air balloon with Jim),
- Loose weight for younger sisters wedding,
- Feel confident,
- Look good,
- Fit into clothes off any rack (especially the clothes made out of handkerchiefs in teeny-bopper shops),
- To be fit,
- For Muscle Man and Jim,
- and for myself.
At this point in time my measurements were as follows:
Waist: 92cms
Bust 97cms
Left Arm: 32cms
Right Arm: 31cms
Right Thigh: 63cms
Left Thigh: 63.5cms
Hips: 113cms
Left Shin: 38cm
Right Shin: 36.5cms
Fitness: Stirring the dinner with a wooden spoon leaves me breathless.
Reflection is a great motivator. I will spend some future entries reflecting on the changes, how they occurred and how I fare today. Until then, happy blogging (Jim and Bob are calling for me).
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